I think I might be an evil person, full of hate, maybe I'm a demon or an antichrist. When I was small, I saw a man that looked like the picture of Christ and he wanted to rip my eyes out like a weed. He looked at me like I wasn't meant to be, ilke a small demon that needed to die.

Fortunately, he disappeared after I closed my eyes. Since then I've been going to church, but I don't really feel that close to God or Jesus. If I was born an evil person, how do I change? - Dan, Houston, TX

Dear Dan –

I do not believe that you were born an evil person. We are all created in the image and likeness of God! That is a basic tenet of our faith.

I also do not believe that any child experiences self hate, or being unloved, or the void of warm feeling that you describe, without some cause. However, without having a clue about your background, I suspect that the cause is human rather than superhuman. Have you consulted a counselor? Or a trusted priest, about this? A trusted priest might be a good starting point, as he could help you discern the spiritual aspect of this.

While I do not deny the presence of evil in the world, I do not believe that the devil comes, uninvited, into the spirit of anyone, especially an innocent child. Just the fact that you are so concerned about this tells me that there is goodness in you. Each step you take towards goodness and light nurtures that goodness of God within you. Even if you don’t feel anything, turning again and again to the church community will keep you on the path. Check out the recent publication of Mother Teresa of Calcutta’s journals – despite her renown as a holy person, she went for years without feeling God’s consoling presence. God’s promise is that anyone who calls upon the name of the Lord will be saved!

Romans 10:9-13 says:
For, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead,
you will be saved.
For one believes with the heart and so is justified, and one confesses with the mouth and so is saved.
For the scripture says, "No one who believes in him will be put to shame."
For there is no distinction between Jew and Greek; the same Lord is Lord of all, enriching all who call upon him.
For "everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved."

Know that you are in our thoughts and prayers.

Chris Weber, Director, CEM Center